Bumble Bees, Doughnuts, and Waspy Windows

I learned a few lessons last week and like any good blogger, I thought I should share so the same mistakes don't happen to you.

Lesson #1: Do not listen to your hubby when he promises nothing will happen if you fight through waist high weeds in a creek bed with your 3 yr. old. Also, a bee with a black backside is not necessarily a wood bee like I thought. Can you see where this is going? BFG and I were trying to catch up to Rhett when a big bee with a black bottom starts buzzing around BFG. Me over BFG's shrieks of panic: "Oh, honey, it's just a wood bee. Just stand real still. It can't hurt you." I totally forgot that I haven't even seen any wood bees in about a month or two. So, we stood still. The bee landed on her back and stayed there which I thought was weird for a wood bee. But, I just shrugged and we kept walking. That bee stuck to her like glue! We got almost to Rhett and the bee left her back but kept buzzing around us. I called him over to see if it was a wood bee or not. Rhett comes over, "It's not a wood bee, it's not a wood bee!!!!!" and started flailing his arms all over the place. Now, BFG had picked some wildflowers earlier that she was carrying around. So, I scream: "Drop the flowers, drop the flowers!!!" as I just about pull her arm out of socket while running as hard as I can in sandals in waist high weeds. Let's put it this way, we got out of the weeds alot faster than we got in and dear Rhett was right behind us. We got away though. Praise the Lord!

Lesson #2: Buying chocolate-iced doughnuts to eat in the car for your child as a treat for being extra good in Wal-mart in 90 degree weather is a bad idea. Even if you are smart enough to have napkins in the car to wrap around the doughnut to keep those precious hands clean. Because you just might not be smart enough to answer no when the child asks you if she can lick the icing off the napkin. This is a bad, bad, bad and very messy idea. And it's not a great idea to stop for gas and roll down the windows while said child is licking the napkin because wasps really, really like sweet stuff. Although, if you are looking for a way to get rid of the extremely messy napkin quick, the threat of a wasp is highly effective. And it's highly effective to be able to clean the child up with no turning of head or complaining. In fact, it's my new threat: We have to wash your face, brush your teeth, take a bath, etc or that wasp will get you.

Lesson #3: Do not have 16 windows replaced in 90+ degree heat. This is a very unpleasant experience. Also, if the installer tells you about how he knocked a softball sized wasp nest out of your wall while installing, it might be a good idea to check the inside of the house for wasps. Especially check the bathroom . . . before you have run your bathwater and are about to step in and every inch of your skin is at risk. No sting thankfully, just a mild panic attack and no bath that morning.

In case your wondering (well, you could probably tell), I am terrified of getting stung. I have never in my life been stung by a bee or a wasp. And ya'll know how paranoid I am. I just know if I ever get stung I will go into anaphalactic (sp?) shock. And ya'll, you die from that quick and we live so far out, I just don't think the ambulance could get here in time.

Learning lessons every day,
Mama Said