Desperate Households

I've been promising a review of the book Desperate Households by Kathy Peel for awhile now. I found it right after I read S.H.E (Sidetracked Home Executives). I liked what I read in SHE, but I went ahead and read Dsp. HH just in case it contained the magic cure in which I could have a clean house without actually cleaning. Uh, it didn't. So don't get your hopes up. I've read so many organizing books now that I think I have to finally face that I am going to have to clean day in and day out for the rest of my life. Sigh.

I liked Dsp. HH and would recommend reading it. However, it wasn't specific enough for me for that to be my only resource. She takes more of a decide on your priorities, decide how much mess you can live with, and how to fix problem areas approach. I am too loopy for that and all that deciding makes my brain hurt. I want a step 1-do this, step 2-do this, etc. (which is more of what SHE is). But I did like it and got some useful things out of it.

I will say that I did absolutely love her Christian viewpoint on maintaining your household. She explains and supports the traditional Christian roles for man and wife. I am thrilled to see her Christian perspective throughout the book since she has been on Oprah and The Early Show. I pray that people who might not have been exposed to the Lord got a chance to read about Him.

The premise of the book is that she divides managing the household into 7 departments and then each chapter is about how to "makeover" that department. Each chapter also includes a chart in which you can find your problem and she gives ideas on how to solve it. Pretty helpful esp. if you do have just some problem areas and are not living in a train wreck like I am.

One thing that stood out to me was she said that it didn't matter how shiny your sink was if your were screaming at your family to get it done. Seeing as I was screaming at my family while trying to get my SHE cards done, I realized the cards and a spotless house aren't worth it if I can't be kind to my family. So, I've laxed up a bit and luckily, the cards get easier and easier to complete taking up less time and lessening the need to scream at anyone or anything that gets in your path.

She says to make a Daily Hit list each morning for the tasks you need to complete. That is helpful. But with the SHE cards, I already have my "list" ready to go without having to take time out to do it.

Desp. HH did inspire me to redo my meal plan/menu or lack thereof. I am so excited about this! I'm going to post my menu makeover plan soon for ya'll. It helps so much. I've done it before but never stuck with it. So, I'm really trying to do something I can just rotate.

Dsp. HH also really, really, really encourages getting up early. This hit me hard 'cause I don't. But I have known for years that I need to get up early and I know that it would improve my household so much. Can you tell I still haven't done it? I'm going to though. Ya'll challenge me. I have GOT to do this. This is going to be one of my biggest struggles. But I'm determined to do it before I start homeschool preschool with BFG this fall.

And I guess I have to say after reading the book, I thought ya' know I really could be okay with some mess. Do I really want to spend time every month cleaning baseboards and dusting every nook and cranny? I seriously think I am just fine with doing a major spring and major fall cleaning for all that kind of stuff which is totally opposite of SHE. That is my complaint with SHE that when you do it fully, you spend hours upon hours cleaning every week. I desperately need my SHE cards to keep up. But I think I may limit the SHE system to help me with the basics to preserve my sanity and keep things rolling smoothly. But I'm not gonna worry about being spotless. I want to live my life and enjoy BFG. There is time enough for a spotless house later on down the road.

Mama Said

Addiction

I learned something about myself while Rhett was off last week. I am totally addicted to my S.H.E. (Sidetracked Home Executive) cards! I wasn't able to do them last week. I tried. Oh how I tried that first day. But my need to see the living room complete trumped the cards. So, last week, I was an absolute mess. Everything was out of sorts and out of order. I thought I was going to go insane! I was completely lost and couldn't keep up with anything. This Monday was a good day because I got to get back on track with the cards. It was such a relief and I felt so much better! And so did Rhett. I think he was as happy as I was to have things back in order.



I totally believe in the cards. Now, I'm still not 100% on them as in doing all the monthly and seasonal stuff yet. But this is definitely the system for me. I have seen a change in myself. I am shifting from the haphazard out-of-control SAHM to a more calm and controlled SAHM. I can no longer just blindly walk through my kitchen with dishes piled up and overflowing. I have actually found myself putting the dishes in the dishwasher the moment I finish with them! Gasp! I know for you Born Organized folks that's a given. But for a S.H.E., this is a huge deal. The past couple of times I have been at my mom's, I literally jumped up and started cleaning up after we ate. I can't believe that either. I usually just laze around looking at the Sunday paper and saying to my sis, "We really should get in there and help Mama." If you knew how much I detest cleaning up my mom's kitchen, you would be even more impressed. I know everyone who eats there with us is related, but it just makes me sick to my stomach to have to touch the partially eaten food on the plates. It's made me sick ever since I was little. I don't have a problem with it at my house even when non-related people eat with us. Oh, well. Just one more way I'm weird and crazy. I know Freud would have a field day with me. LOL!
Anyway, point is: S.H.E. cards good. Me like.
Mama Said

Muffin Tin Madness and My Weekly Plan

How cute is this idea from http://sycamorestirrings.blogspot.com/2008/06/muffin-tin-monday.html! I love it and BFG loved it, too. I was doing it on the fly and didn't have much healthy stuff, but here's what is in in: Frito spirals, pretzels, Ritz cracker, white cheddar crackers, jelly beans (dessert), Ritz bits, Cheerios, ranch dressing, shredded cheese, pepperoni, ketchup, and carrot sticks. I can just see loads of possibilities for this. I am thinking it would be so cool for a theme for like snacks for a Bible study or something. Let everyone get creative. You could have one with different types of olives or even an Italian themed one or a Mexican themed one. Fun, fun, fun!

Here's my weekly plan:

Monday-Paper Work Day (bills, clip coupons, make menu and grocery lists, etc.)

Tuesday-Grocery & Errand day

Wednesday-Moderate Cleaning (If I had my monthly cards in, I would work on these. But right now, I try to get the house in order and ready for Heavy Cleaning day.)

Thursday-Heavy Cleaning Day (like my Weekly Home Blessing-vacuuming, mopping, scrub bathroom, etc.)

Friday-Free Day (Ha! I don't think I 've had one of these in a while.)

Saturday-Work on Home Projects, Family Time

Sunday-Church, Family, NO Cleaning!

My Laundry Schedule:

Mondays-Darks, Lights

Tuesday-Whites, Jeans

Wednesday-Delicates, Ironing, Sheets

Thursday-Monthly/Seasonal Items like rugs & curtains, Towels, Alternating Weeks: dishtowels and cloth napkins

Friday-Nada!

S.H.E.: How's It Workin' For Me

As ya'll know, I started the Sidetracked Home Executive method of managing my household a while back. The system basically is using 3.5X5 index cards and dividers in a file box to keep you on track for daily, weekly, monthly, and seasonal tasks. I've been meaning to post an update on how it's going. Today, my friend e-mailed me with questions about it and I told her I would address it here.

So, how is it working for you? In some ways, I think it's working great! I really like having what needs to be done organized. But I am working so hard that it seems I never get to rest. And that's with just the daily and weekly cards. I haven't even added in the monthly and seasonally yet. But, keep in mind, that I am also in the middle of home renovation while I am trying to start this. So, I'm trying to do major home projects while completing the cards. I have decided that there is no point in adding the monthly and seasonally until we are further along on the house. It would be ridiculous for me to be running around cleaning baseboards and light switches when I should be painting or unpacking boxes.

Do you think you accomplish more than you did before? I definitely am accomplishing more than before. I am actually able to pay our bills and pay them on time with this system! Rhett had to take over bill paying about a year ago because I was so overwhelmed that I could not get them paid on time and was in a wild panic on their due dates trying to run all over town or getting the computer to act right. Father's Day gifts were ordered and delivered on time. Library books are back on time. Laundry is done like clockwork. My purse is staying cleaned out. It's good stuff.
Are you more focused on what needs to be done are have you become a "slave" to your cards? On any given week day, I have like 30 cards to complete. That just seems insane to me and there are lots of time I feel like just a slave to my cards. Sometimes I find myself ill with BFG 'cause she won't leave me alone and I feel that I must get my cards done. In the book they tell you to put the frequency of the task that you want it to get done, not what you are doing now. I think I did that and now it's just impractical. Like I want to sweep the kitchen and dining area every day and have a daily card for it. But I have not done it one time. I am so exhausted by the time dinner is over that there is no way I'm sweeping. I refile it every day until I hit my vacuum day. Then, it doesn't matter. Or if someone is coming to visit, I run the electric sweeper real quick. I just think it's stupid to look at that sweep card all day every day and feel bad about something I am NOT going to get done. At least not yet.
I do think that it is a long process to get this system in place. It seems to get a little smoother and smoother each week. Hopefully, as time passes, I will be able to get the cards completed more efficiently. I have noticed changes, such as I'm starting to memorize the daily tasks and am developing routines that knock out several in 5-10 minutes. Also, I'm picking up more as I go 'cause I know if I don't, I'll be doing it with a card later anyway. One big thing I am realizing is that it is not good to let the house go during the weekend. I spend so much time on Mondays getting things back in order after a messy weekend.
Do you like the card format or do you prefer working from a list? I love the cards over a list!!! I think it is so much better. I really like the whole idea of the file box. I love completing a weekly task and chucking it to the next week and knowing that my brain is free from thinking of that task and I won't forget it the next go around either. I don't know if that really makes sense. I can't really describe it. I guess it just works for me.
Overall here's the thing: I do not like to clean house and this system has you doing 6-10 hours of moderate to hard cleaning per week. It just makes me mad to think about that and my poor feet really can't take that much. But, the thing is the authors are being very realistic. It really takes that long to keep your house clean. I guess I just wish there was some little super-duper formula where my house could be sparkling clean and organized with very little time and effort. Oh, well. At least I'm blessed that this does get to be my full-time job. I can't imagine working, having children, and taking care of the home.

I am reading Kathy Peel's Desperate Households and it's pretty interesting and a different approach based on what I've read so far. I'm gonna post my findings from that soon.
I'll also try to post my weekly schedule from SHE soon, too.

Thanks for asking,
Mama Said

Sidetracked

I recently read Sidetracked Home Executives which is the book from which Flylady based her book. I've done Flylady before and did great for about 10 months. Then, BFG was born and I've been going downhill ever since. I can't keep up with ANYTHING! Most of the time I don't know who I am or where I'm at. I can start running my bath water, walk away, and within 2 minutes completely forget that I ever started it. I hate being like this. Once upon a time far far away, I was really, really smart. Now, I can't even utter a complete sentence to my 3 yr. old without stammering. What is wrong with me? constantly goes through my mind. And the messier my house gets, the less I want to do anything about it.

I really think that I'm like the authors of S.H.E. and totally sidetracked. I might start something, but something else catches my attention and I'm off and may never get back to what I started. This is why I asked Rhett to take over paying the bills. I could look at a bill for a week straight and think "I have got to pay that today" and get sidetracked and never pay it until the last day and would be in a mad panic to be sure it wasn't late. I think I am so overwhelmed esp. with the new house that I must have something concrete to keep me in order. I am so tired of living life in a mad panic, a chaotic day late and a out-of-budget dollar short. I have to say I am scared though. Scared to start one more thing and months later mourn the fact that I never finished it. So, if I start this SHE plan, I have to see it through. I have to.

If your are FLYing or are a Flylady dropout like me, you may be interested in Sidetracked Home Executives. I really like things from both plans. But, sitting on this side of the fence, I think I like SHE's plan for task organization better. You use index cards in a file box with numbered dividers. To me, I need that "okay, on May 16, I am doing this, this, and this." I think the lists with Flylady were too vague and too easy to put off. And, if you throw a little Dave Ramsey philosophy in there, a list keeps me concentrating on what all I have left to do. With the cards, I can complete one at a time and get my momentum going by feeling I have accomplished something.

So, I was thinking about trying to start off really slow to ensure success. I thought I'd get my feet wet with something like wake up early and make the beds for a couple of weeks or so. But, I talked my sister into doing this thing with me and she started buying up index cards and dividers and such and is ready to jump in. So, I guess I'll try to get up to my shins wet at least. We're really hoping our friend Melissa will join us and keep us motivated. Hint, hint. (Casi, we would ask you, honey, but you are the one we are all striving to be like! LOL! You don't need it. You are what they call "Born Organized.") So, whisper a prayer for us, everyone. Our families need it!