Not Me! Monday---BFG Style!

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.




It's time again for Not Me! Monday, but with a twist this time. I'm writing it from BFG's point of view.





From BFG, age 4:





I did NOT put floam in my Barbie's hair! And this picture was NOT after Mama had gotten most of it out. And it was NOT the singing Diamond Castle Barbie I got for Christmas so Mama did NOT have to sit and pick out every little floam ball instead of trying to wash it out.





I did NOT tell Mama she ruined my day and my whole life when she would not sing a third song at bedtime the other night 'cause I am so NOT overdramatic. And I do NOT get that trait from Mama. No way!





I have NOT been telling Mama that I've outgrown Winnie-the-Pooh. I did NOT ask her to sell my Winnie-the-Pooh toys and she did NOT scream that even grown ups like Winnie-the-Pooh and there was no way she was selling that toy.





I did NOT get very upset and tell Mama that Curly Sue (my 7 yr. old cousin) said she was not getting married because she was going to do gymnastics. I did NOT say "But she was supposed to get married to her man." I so do NOT care because I'm gonna stay single and live with Mama forever! I also did NOT cry when I found out Curly Sue got saved (accepted Christ as her personal Saviour) because I knew that meant I was the last one who wouldn't get to "drink the juice in the little cups and eat those square things!"





When Mama was sick and Daddy bought her cough drops, I absolutely did NOT think the cough drops would make her cough. And once I figured out what they really did, I did NOT run and get Mama one every time she coughed.





After praying for a baby brother or sister, I did NOT ask Mama and Daddy how would God put the baby in her belly. They did NOT try to avoid the question. And I did NOT keep pressing them with "Does He put it in through your nose? Does He put it in through your ear?" Oh, and I totally did NOT tell Mama the other day that the doctor did not cut my cousins out of my aunt's belly like he did me---that my cousins came out my aunt's bu*t I think. I would NEVER even mention that because I'm much too young to even think about that stuff.





I did NOT watch the gymnastics American Cup with Mama and refer to each girl gymnast by her aah-balls (which is NOT what I call a woman's chest area). I did NOT like the girl with the pink aah-balls and the one with sparkly aah-balls the best!





I did NOT eat so much Fun Dip candy that I got blisters in my mouth either. Un-unh! Mama would NEVER even let me eat candy much less 2 packs of 3fer Fun Dips.








Finally, on Saturday night, I did NOT scream and jump and down when The Lawrence Welk Show came on. I did NOT say, "YES! MAMA, COME IN HERE! OUR SHOW IS ON! COME QUICK! IT'S TIME TO ROCK AND ROLL!" at the top of my lungs. Oh, and I so do NOT call Lawrence Welk (the person) "Charlotte's Web." I NEVER pronounce things wrong. And just in case you don't know, The Lawrence Welk Show is a musical variety show my grandparents watched when they were kids.



Bye! I'm off to play!
BFG