Hence the Name: HOT Cocoa!

Yup, earned me another Worst Mom of the Year Awards. And right after I spent two hours freezing my toes off for BFG to sell Girl Scout Cookies, too. That kind of just doesn't seem fair.

It all started at the cookie booth really. My mom came to buy cookies and, of course, gave me money to buy BFG hot cocoa because I'm obviously to incompetent to care for my own child. Although, by the time the whole hot cocoa incident was over, I think she may be right.

For whatever dumb reason, the girls are not allowed to eat or drink at the booth. So, we had to wait until we were thoroughly frozen and our two hours were over before we could get our cocoa. Being the cheapskate that I am, I decided that the bookstore coffee shop's (where we had the booth) prices were too high and that we would go to the gas station to get cocoa for her and coffee for me.

So, off we go to the Golden Gallon! I fill hers up first so it can be cooling while I'm fixing mine. It sat for a looong time with no lid while I went all Starbucks on my coffee. Of course, I now know I would never qualify for a job at Starbucks because I totally ruined my coffee. I finally finished and put cold half and half in BFG's cocoa and stirred it, blew on it, tasted it, and everything to ensure it was drinkable. I slap a lid on it, hand it to her, and tell her to be careful because it may still be a little too hot for her, but I think it's okay.

We are walking up to the register to pay. I turn around and realize BFG has taken a drink and it is burning her mouth! She is holding it in her mouth because she doesn't want to spit it out on the floor! The girl at the register was getting ready to wipe down the counter because the people before us had spilt their coffee. I thought fast and screamed, "Give me your paper towel" and grabbed the paper towel out of her hand and held it up to BFG's mouth for her to spit out the cocoa.

We're in rare form by that point. BFG's is squalling and in pain. The salesclerk has no idea what is going on and cannot keep up with our madness. I scream out Water! and run for the bottled water dragging a wailing BFG behind me. I grab a bottle of water (after noting the cheapest one I might add) and shove it into BFG's mouth.

We make it back to the counter to pay for our drinks and the clerk starts talking about my Vera Bradley purse and showing me hers and her wallet and telling me how much she spent on them and who got her into them, yada yada. I'm thinking 1) I only have this purse because my mom bought it for me, 2) I just burned my child who is still standing here crying which translates into this is not the time to discuss the merits of Vera Bradley purses!!!! and 3) you obviously have no kids because another mother would not be having this conversation with me right now!!! Are you kidding me?

She did offer BFG a cup of ice which made her pretty happy. As we are getting in the car, I realize that I don't think she charged me for the water. Crap! But fortunately for me, she is a smoker and had already stepped outside for a smoke. The unfortunate part was that the only thing between me and her was a policeman in his car. Still, I went ahead and yelled out, Did I pay for the water? She blanched and said she wasn't sure. Then, she said yeah, yeah, you did. You did. Don't worry about it. Y'all, I really don't think I did. Unless the coffee was on sale. I looked around for a sign and didn't see one. So, I'm trying to tell myself it was really like I got a free coffee because for some reason that makes me feel better about the whole thing. Oh, and the cop was too busy on his cell phone to notice that I possibly walked off with a "free" water.

So, I left the gas station with a burned child, a ruined coffee, a bottle of water with one drink out of it, a cup of ice, and a hot chocolate the she finally drank cold. Oh, and all the hubbub made me forget to pick up my thyroid meds at the pharmacy. So, that will cost us another $5.00 and hour's time to drive back to town to get those. I'm kinda wishing I'd just shelled out the extra few dollars for drinks at the bookstore because I ended up spending way more. When will I learn?
Mama Said